Last Thursday morning I was on a plane getting ready to head for Dallas. It’s always exciting to travel even if it is for work.
I’m sitting there cleaning up old emails in my Blackberry minding my own business getting ready for the flight to take off at 7:45 am. As the flight attendant was preparing to close the door a lady jumps up out of her seat and heads for the exit. I figured out this lady was afraid to fly and the attendant was trying to calm her down by telling her everything is going to be fine. The lady finally came back and sat down. At this point I am telling my wife that I am going to try and calm her down because I am a “fixer”. My wife said to leave it alone, it’s none of my business.
A few minutes later the door was slammed shut and this lady couldn’t take it. She was back at the front immediately and she needed off now! They tried to talk her off the edge but she wasn’t hearing it. She came back, got her two kids and proceeded to get off the plane. In her mind the fear of flying outweighed what anyone thought of her delaying the flight. We had to sit there and wait for them to find her bags and get them off the plane.
I don’t know where their final destination was but let’s assume a couple of things. Let’s say her and the two kids were going to see some relatives down in Texas. The kids are excited to go on a trip and they get to fly in a plane and all the fun stuff that goes along with it. All of a sudden the trip is canceled and the fun is over. Not only do they not get to experience the good times, they will probably get some heat on the way home. If that had been me I would have been mad at myself and would have been snapping at my kids when they were asking why we weren’t going on this great vacation we had been talking about for weeks.
Now before you get mad at me I do understand certain phobias and I know that in this person’s mind her fears are as real as the chair I am sitting in. I tell the story wondering what fears I have that hold me and my family back from experiencing life’s best.
You have probably heard the acronym for fear as False Evidence Appearing Real. That’s all it really is when you break it down. The flight went great. The takeoff and landing were as smooth as ever and there was barely even a bump along the way. Her fear of flying was completely unnecessary yet she probably hopped in a car to head home which statistically is more dangerous than flying.
Another interesting thing happened though. A lady that was sitting across from me started to get scared. She said I wonder if this gal had a weird vibe or something. She was close enough where I could diffuse that right away. Fear is contagious. It gets on one person then that person gets the next person riled up and it gets on them and so on. It’s the same with negativity, it’s like a disease and it spreads.
A fear a lot of us have is talking to certain people whether it is in person or on the phone and the head trash that goes on before it happens. What are they going to think, am I going to sound stupid, will they think I’m bugging them and so on. Typically none of these are a reality. Why not think of the positives. Even if it is a sales call and they say no, at least now you have eliminated them from your call list and you don’t have to think about them any more. But what if they say yes but you were too scared to make the call. What did you miss out on? It could be a great relationship that leads you into a new career path. By entertaining fear you miss out just like those kids missed out on going on their trip.
Be careful what you read, watch, listen to and who you hang around. Their fears and insecurities will rub off on you. Guard your heart and mind like it is being attacked because it is. I got to spend a weekend with people that are full of faith and moving forward in life. That is contagious too.
